what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Church boner. Awkwardddd
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
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