We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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