Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize