do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
