is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
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How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
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