I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Randomize
