I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
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