So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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