Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
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