When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
You've changed since you got that strap on
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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