So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
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