hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize