non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
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