Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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