Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
