So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I just found a bag of teeth...
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
