So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
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