dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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