Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery. http://tfl.nu/2bt2
  Replies (1) Good night (1105) Bad night (571)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  "it" just moved

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): "it" just moved http://tfl.nu/94mg
  Replies (10) Good night (790) Bad night (941)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  Pants 0. Shit 1.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (269): Pants 0. Shit 1. http://tfl.nu/y752
  Replies (8) Good night (991) Bad night (3362)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird. http://tfl.nu/mxsq
  Replies (8) Good night (694) Bad night (2137)
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (506): Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT! http://tfl.nu/lyyu
  Replies (3) Good night (867) Bad night (3665)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn. http://tfl.nu/0pkd
  Replies (12) Good night (918) Bad night (3811)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (952): I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga http://tfl.nu/qw9z
  Replies (29) Good night (13441) Bad night (1120)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW! http://tfl.nu/gdwn
  Replies (6) Good night (844) Bad night (5413)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping. http://tfl.nu/hx4w
  Replies (12) Good night (4597) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): Why are there maracas in the dishwasher? http://tfl.nu/o2j7
  Replies (14) Good night (5349) Bad night (880)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow

  (1-785): View more from Kansas

  why would you restrict a girl of that

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow (1-785): why would you restrict a girl of that http://tfl.nu/flyl
  Replies (6) Good night (2254) Bad night (768)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying http://tfl.nu/r0td
  Replies (15) Good night (722) Bad night (2167)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar http://tfl.nu/zdja
  Replies (5) Good night (1524) Bad night (598)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car. http://tfl.nu/zuv0
  Replies (13) Good night (2596) Bad night (698)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all http://tfl.nu/abyi
  Replies (5) Good night (1236) Bad night (458)

Randomize