How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
vagina is talking i cant
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.