Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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