Where is the hickey?
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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