eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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