I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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