Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize