The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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