he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize