He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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