I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're like the curious george of whores
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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