dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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