Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
