ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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