as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
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