I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I intend to get homeless drunk
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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