She's JV to your varsity
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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