oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
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