even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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