Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
