Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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