I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
