Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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