Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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