I'm really into asian looking animals
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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