K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize