You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
