And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
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