Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
