I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I am midnight drunk by noon
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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