Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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