Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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