Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
