I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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